The “x’s” below identify a grammatical error. I only provide the location of the error, not the correction. I’m sure some of these errors are debatable (the first sentence’s commas, for example. I also expect that I missed a few myself. If you have feedback, please do send it!
Margu, the Orc, sauntered confidently into the large, open, smelly hall and stared.
Along with Grabber, they looked at their large armies standing awkwardly.
Margu’s army is recognized by its large red banners. Grabber’s army has
purple banners. Margu being is a Cave Orc and Grabber being is a larger Hill Orc. So,
Margu anticipated that Grabber would stir up some trouble.
Looking closely, Grabber said, “Your army looks like children. It’s an offense to
Orc-kind.”
Margu replied, “You are too blind. And your scent reeks of perfume. (this is a very
bad thing to say to an Orc). They’re every bit as tough as your pitifully excuse for
an army.”
“You’re a fool. There are no differences between my army and the greatest Orc
army of all time! It’s ranks stretch to the very edges of the hall. My soldiers are
well known for being brutal. You can’t even compare them to another Chieftan’s
army. When your army stands next to mine there, you can see all the differences,
such as, their hugely size, large teeth, terrible disposition, and etc.”
Margu laughed. “I will tell you two things. First, they are clumsy. That means they
will do bad things, like trip easily, bump others’ often, unnecessarily fall, and
generally attack slowly. You need to make them practice more. Then, you can train
them into a stronger army. ‘Second, my army is smarterer. That means we have more
advantages, such as quicker thinking, larger brains, and faster reflexes. We can
strategically plan several moves ahead. Also my troops won’t make the same mistake
over and over again. They learn. Our army’s effectiveness will be very different indeed.”
Grabber became irate. His face turned red (which looked pretty odd on a green
Orc). He yelled, “I will show you and your stupid smart brains! Hill Orcs, follow
me!”
With that, Grabber turned and walked forward, looking at his troops behind him
and walked right into an open pit. And every one of his Orcs followed him into the
pit to their doom.
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